9 Reasons I'm Leaving My Boyfriend

Wednesday, March 26, 2014

That was a sneaky title, wasn't it? :)

A little funny to kick this off: I mentioned to my boyfriend that I'd be writing a post about 'fictional characters I'd leave him for' just to gauge how he felt about it. His response? "It's cool. Katniss (Jennifer Lawrence) is at the top of my list." I can't even blame him. She's probably at the top of my list too. So with a green light from the Mister (if I needed it, I guess) and a little tweaking of the topic, here are the 9 celebrities/characters I might, under certain circumstances, consider leaving my man for - except not really, probably.

CARMELO ANTHONY

Considering that my boyfriend and Carmelo share a lot of the same features (deep-set eyes, caramel skin, full lips, endearing crooked smile and 6'7" stature), it only makes sense that he's at the top of my list. I like that in many ways he's clean cut, but the tatted sleeves let you know he's just the right amount of bad boy. Plus, I love his basketball game. He's not a loud mouth, but his stats scream "superstar". And even though the Knicks' record this year is somewhere in the 3-652 range, Carmelo's performance is always stellar, which is probably why it's likely we'll lose him next year. Boooo.


CHARLES MICHAEL DAVIS/MARCEL GERARD

Another boy with deep-set eyes. If you can't tell already, I swoon for a mysterious gaze. But I'm still a little unsure of this one. Leave my man? Ehh, Charles is still a little new to the game, having just made it to primetime in The Originals as vampire king of Louisiana, Marcel. But as his hotness marinates episode after episode, he may find himself a seat at the table, so I had to include him. If only for the extra eye candy :)



JAX TELLER

If you don't watch Sons Of Anarchy, you'll probably have no idea who this is, but that's okay because you won't ever forget him now. Jax is the hottest biker boy, err, biker President, and he's the perfect combination of tough and sweet, and always trustworthy. He loves his wife to pieces but he's also a brawlin' son of a you-know-what. Plus, he's got a beard, and you know what they say (or maybe it's just me?), never trust a man without a 'stache. Again, maybe just me, but he kind of looks a little like Jesus, no? Anyways, just for good measure, click here. You're welcome.


JARED LETO 

Jared Leto's got a silky, crooning voice that just oozes of sex. We established this two days ago. But aside from a voice that could make me a believer, he's also a downright thoughtful, lovely person. Interviews with him read somewhere between talking to the Dalai Lama and a rock god. And it doesn't hurt that I think the man is flipping' gawwgeouusss. Apparently, I dig the Jesus look-a-likes. I'm not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing, but I now can't stop singing "When You Were Young" by The Killers ("He doesn't look a thing like Jesus, but he talks like a gentleman, like you remember when you were young"). #WhatsWrongWithMe #DidIJustHastagInABlogPost


DWAYNE JOHNSON/THE ROCK

In case you missed my still crushing onThe Rock post, let me rehash the important part: what is a crush list without The Rock? It doesn't matter what it is! Okay, cheesy WWE reference, but it still stands. The man is fiiinneeee. There are no words.

IDRIS ELBA

In The Wire, Idris' startling good looks and charismatic persona made me love his character Stringer Bell, a character we're suppose to really dislike by the end. But, SPOILER ALERT!, when he dies I'm screaming bloody murder at the screen, although Stringer kinda deserved it. Seeing him in Takers opposite many a hot men in suits and using his natural English accent, solidified it for me. I damn near died. Idris also serves as my substitute for Denzel because although he's still the man, I have to acknowledge that Denzel's old enough to be my father :\

DANIEL GILLIES/ELIJAH MIKAELSON 

Now although I love me a good Originals brother showdown and a Klaus speech about destruction of all those who oppose him, I have to admit that I'm a little bit fonder of the other, less maniacal brother. I guess I just prefer the good guys (re: Stephan Salvatore). I'm also a sucker for a man in a suit, which is pretty much Elijah's uniform. But I also love Daniel's laid-back leather jacket over a white v-neck. Good thing I don't have to choose.

DRAKE

mentioned previously how he was my dream guy for most of my teenage years. It was a borderline obsession honestly; I still have the notebook with pictures, including baby pictures (?!) of him plastered all over it. I could offer proof, but I think that's enough embarrassment for one day. Suffice to say, I loved Jimmy Brooks long before the wheelchair, and I blasted his first few tracks like Do What You Do and Asthma Team back when he was just Aubrey Graham. My 13-year-old-heart was convinced we were soulmates because of how cute and well-spoken he was (& still is).

ROBERT PATTINSON

I'm sure many disagree with me on this one, and I have no real explanation, aside from the fact that there is just something so romantic about his face, if that makes any sense at all (& I'm sure it doesn't). All that intensity in his deep-set, brooding, blue eyes and chiseled jawline. Robert can intensely love me anytime.

Clearly, all of my men of my dreams, and the man of my reality, have deep, brooding eyes, dark features and beards (*cough* real men). Yet, there's no discrimination 'round these parts. Eric Northman, you're welcome anytime.

1; 2; 3; 4, 4.5; 5; 6; 7; 89.

Currently

Tuesday, March 25, 2014

I admit that I totally procrastinated today and found myself starting at a blank screen at 9pm on Monday, the day I should've had a post up at 8am. And considering that I have yet to workout for the day, this may not even go up until the wee hours of Tuesday :\ I just couldn't for the life of me decide on something to write about. Good, now that we've gotten that out of the way, I'm stealing a post idea from Kari @ Not Quite Ginger, my social butterfly :)

Watching last week's episode of Teen Wolf. It didn't get watched last Monday, and I heard that a main character dies, and I'll cry if it's Stiles, and the season finale is on tonight. So basically, I've got a night full of teenage wolf watching ahead of me, and I'm only sort of mad at it (and only if said named character above dies). Something about that wording seems mildy inappropriate but we're rolliiinnngggg..

Thinking about writing a novel. It's one of the first thoughts in the morning and keeps me up at night when I should be fast asleep. I think about as I sit in theaters watching some of my favorite books adapted to the silver screen. I hear someone say something interesting while strolling down 5th and start building an entire story around him. In sum, it's a part of me. And after much encouragement from the blogging community and people in real life, I think I'm ready to make steps in that direction (scroll to the bottom of this post for one of the first steps!)

Listening to 30 Seconds To Mars' Love, Lust, Faith & Dreams album. I've been obsessed with it for months now. Jared Leto is an amazing talent and his voice is like butter. Panties drop all over the world when that boy belts. If that's crass, I don't wanna be right. I love many of the messages in this album whether it's to ignore the designations and just believe in/have faith in something that drives you (End Of All Days), or standing up and never backing down (The Race).


(still) Reading F. Scott Fitzgerald's The Great Gatsby. I've technically been reading this for a month. When I saw the trailer for the movie last summer, I was so infatuated with the glitz and glam, but other books (i.e. Divergent) got read instead. As as already established, I'm not about that "see the movie but haven't read the book" life so I skipped it when it was in theaters.

Loving the process of finally decorating my apartment. When I first moved back to NYC, it was a week before my first day of law school and I had purchased none of the casebooks but had all of the assignments. I barely had time to make my bed up and throw my clothes in the closet. Four years later and I still haven't customized my apartment to feel like "me" just yet. Two weeks ago, I bought a new duvet cover from West Elm and in the process of designing my perfect bed complete with the fluffiest pillows, got bitten by the decorating bug (Again with the wording. I promise, my bed has none of the bugs.). I'm no interior designer, but I'm excited to finally claim my space (and fulfill a resolution, whoop whoop!).

Drinking the last of the champagne from Sunday night. No swig escapes. 'nough said.

Eating nothing at the moment. Disappointing, I know.

Missing college. Especially my first year. I had the time of life, and little responsibility. Memories are great, but they also come with nostalgia. What I wouldn't give to be at a white out game in Beaver Stadium, drunk off hours of tailgating and gleefully screaming as my friends toss me in the air for each touchdown point.

Wanting my H&M package to arrive. It's been over 2 weeks since I ordered it, aaannnddd it says it was delivered on Friday. Umm, I don't have it. Aside from that, I really want to travel. I probably say this 3 times a day, but seriously, if I don't get out of this country for a few days soon, I may just lose my mind.

Looking forward to be fit again. I've been playing this back and forth game with my weight since senior year of high school. It's frustrating, and I can't wait to finally be done with yo-yoing.

What's your current situation?

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If you scrolled just to check out my first step, you are for real the bomb.com.
Photo Credit
While looking for quotes to inspire me, I found this one, which is a reminder that the only requirement to be a writer is to write often.  Aside from the rare instance when what I have to say is too difficult to formulate into words, it's usually the want of a topic that stops me from writing. So I went on a frenzy to find writing prompts to get my pen going. I noticed that many of the bloggers I know also enjoy writing (Well duh Kari, bloggers do write after all) and two lovely readers commented on a fiction post that they'd be interested in a writing link-up. I'm not quite sure if I'm ready to commit to a weekly link-up of sorts, but I thought it'd be cool if while sharing my writing, others shared their writing with me too! Plus, I really like reading other people's fiction. Here's the writing prompt I'll be interpreting for Friday's post. If you care to write something for it as well, leave a comment below so I can check it out or comment on Friday's post with a link to your post.
PROMPT #1: 
Describe your character using just the items in his/her desk drawer (ex. important items, mixtapes, photos).
 If you'll be joining in, good luck! If not, just forget about this paragraph, 'kay? :)

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Things I Don't Believe In.

Friday, March 21, 2014

I was inspired by a post I saw a few weeks ago while browsing through blogs, but I can't remember which one. If anyone knows, comment below so I can give them credit!

Because every post needs at least one picture & I'm really diggin my lashes and brows in this one (see previous post).

++ Commercials. Unless I have something to get during the break or I've gotta go, I usually can't stand the dreaded commercial break. And of course, they always happen just as Katherine's voice comes out of Elena's mouth or Cyrus tells Olivia that she & Fitz are not star-crossed lovers - basically the "oh shit" moment. There's nothing worse than a commercial cliffhanger. Except maybe the cliffhanger at the end of an episode. That blows.

++ The Dentist. I can't say I don't understand the necessity. I just really really don't like going to the dentist's office. The terror from visits still lingers after burrowing* itself into my tiny little head 20 years ago. As a child, I'd always get in trouble for having a cavity, even though it wasn't my fault. I had really deep grooves in my teeth that regular brushing just can't get to. TMI? Probably. "Laughing gas" has always made me nauseous not happy, and the big ass numbing needle is freaking scary. And I just don't like being poked and prodded like a test subject on a slab of marble, okay?
     * Btw, I really like this word "burrowing". It's like I can just see it happening, that animal of fear digging it's way into my innocent little heart to dwell there foe evarr.          Just me? My Bad. 

++ Chapped lips. This is probably on everyone's list, but in this dead of winter weather Manhattan has been experiencing recently, it has become a daily annoyance of mine. I've lost track of all lip blams because I stuff them arbitrarily into coat pockets and purses. And when you've only just run out to the corner bodega for a bagel at 7am, grabbing just your wallet, and the wind hits you in face so hard that you can almost feel your lips screaming? Worst. Feeling. Ever.

++ Too much Sex And The City. Well, not literally, of course. That's... potentially, really unsanitary. Just sayin'. I've probably watched every episode of Carrie & Co. 3 times over and never get tired of it. E! always plays mini marathons on Saturdays and I'll just keep it on while I do things around the house (aka sit on the couch mesmerized and ignore the dirty dishes in the sink). When I watch the show, I fall in love with the city all over again, and feel the urge to go out and rediscover it.

++ Rejecting "my roots" because I don't have natural hair. #TeamNatural girls irk my existence. Yeah, I chemically relax my hair and wear clip-in extensions when I feel like it. So what? All it means is that I miss my bra-strap length hair and I don't miss crying my eyes out as my mother tried to detangle my 'natural' hair as a child. It most definitely doesn't mean that I reject my beautiful brown skin. I'm not throwing any shade your way because you choose to rock natural locks; let me be with my 'unnatural' hair.

++ Seeing the movie before reading the book. I just can't do it. It's like I'm programmed to reject the thought and although this has made for many awkward conversations (friend: wanna go see _____ this weekend? me: sorry, i can't. i have to read the book first), I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm sure this 'programming' stems from my desire to be an author myself, and the hopes that if I were ever honored with publication and further a movie adaptation, that people would read my words first. Wishful thinking. Besides, the book is always better! There are so many books I need to read because I'm anxious for the upcoming film like The Fault In Our Stars and The Maze Runner. Oh, and this 'programming' is also the reason I have yet to see Harry Potter 5-8 because I have yet to read 5-7 (I heard my favorite character died in 5 and have been reluctant to read it ever since).
Which brings me to the film adaptation I saw last night - Divergent! I was a bundle of nerves for about the first ⅓ of the movie, and I left as a bundle of tears. It wasn't perfect but it was so much better than I expected. But don't take my word for it, I cried through most of the movie because I'm ridiculous. Go see it for yourself! Like now. Hurry along :)

What are some things you don't believe in? I'm sure the weekend isn't one of them. Happy Friday!

Luscious Lashes, Oh My!

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

We're talking all about insecurities today. Well, kind of. Remember this post I wrote a few weeks ago about feeling beautiful and accepting ourselves flaws and all? Well, I left out my personal 'flaw' in anticipation of this post: I hate that my eyelashes are so short. I watch makeup tutorials of girls with long, dark lashes who are all like "all I need is any old mascara and I'll have lush baby doll lashes" (not really) while I'm over here struggling with fake lashes and getting duo glue stuck in my eye (yes really). I like big, full falsies, for sure because it's fun to feel glammed up. But I also want to feel confident with my natural lashes or just a touch of mascara as well. So, as I advised, I did something about it.

Products that are formulated for lash growth have been said to cause some disturbing side effects like iris color change and lid discoloration. Um, the skin around my eyes is already a bit dark (although getting lighter), so no thank you! And those products are pricey. Latisse is $120 for 4 weeks worth. After searching for tips on how to grow my eyelashes longer and falling upon a few articles like this one and this one, I mixed up my own little eyelash growth serum and dedicated myself to really applying it as often as I could remember.


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Castor Oil - aka my family's favorite response. If you had any skin or hair issues (dry skin or hair, break outs etc.), you were told to put some castor oil on it. Admittedly, that wasn't always the solution (see many of my teenage pimples turned full-blown breakouts), but castor oil does have some major benefits, including treating hair thinning and hair loss. I fill up about ½ the bottle with castor oil.
Coconut Oil - Whether you consume it or use it topically, coconut oil is highly regarded as the "superman" of oils. Cosmetically, its fatty acids moisturize the skin and protect hair from damage. And guess what? Eyelashes can be damaged and can actually fall out, so protecting those babies sounds like a good idea. I top off the other ½ of the bottle with some coconut oil.
Jojoba Oil - We talked about this! I'm all about jojoba oil and it's moisturizing properties. Jojoba adds moisture without the shine or greasiness that can come with many moisturizing products. I only add a few drops of this into the serum.

I apply this nightly with a clean mascara wand to my upper and lower lashes, as well as my eyebrows (did I mention that my thin eyebrows are an insecurity of mine too?). I'm careful not to overload the brush with product by dabbing the excess onto a tissue first. Then, I pull the wand through my lashes a few times and brush whatever's left on it through my eyebrows. I'd say that the serum should only be applied at night. Although you could very well apply this serum in the morning too, I don't like to. I may wipe off the excess, but I like to load this moisturizing goodness onto my lashes, which can make my eyes feel a bit heavy. Aside from that, I'm obsessed with this serum and the results I get with it.

It's not a miracle mixture. You won't wake up with "they're real" lashes (although they will be super soft!). But, over the two or so months I've been applying it to my lashes and brows, I've noticed a few differences, although I don't expect to see any dramatic difference until a while longer. I'm talking I'll do my makeup and not touch my eyebrows because "they look fine" kind of difference, which is a whole new world for me. What I've noticed the most is the density and softness of my lashes. Before, I felt like I was searching for an eyelash to put mascara on. Now, I marvel at how substantial they feel when I touch them, like I can bat them at passersby and make them swoon. Whether or not I've got swoon-worthy lashes or not, as stated before, I'm creating what I think is the most beautiful version of me. That's the most important part.

*NOTE: I was sure that I took 'before' pictures for comparison, but can't find them. If I do, I will add them to the post!

My Totally (Non-Maliciously but Admittedly) Stolen Salad

Monday, March 17, 2014

I've been absent from the blog for an entire week. I repeat, an entire week. All because Time Warner Cable is the devil's personal play thing. Don't believe me? Ask anyone who lives in New York City and is forced to pay exorbitant prices for its subpar services. Over $100 for error messages and slow ass internet after 8pm. And I've been without proper internet access since late Wednesday night. I tried to stay off it on Thursday & Friday because it was seriously 10x slower than dial-up. And then it completely conked out on Saturday in the middle of a serious Netflix binge. Best part - Time Warner is closed on the weekend.
So I come to you from my Blogger app on my iPhone (which is super annoying to blog on by the way) with one of my favorite salads that I've been devouring for the past 3 months, my take on a traditional cobb salad. Salads don't always have to be boring or bland. In fact, I refuse to eat salads like that. I like to enjoy what I eat, and I really enjoy avocados and turkey bacon. So get out a huge bowl and a bag of lettuce and prepare to fall in lurrvve :)

Kari's Turkey Bacon Avocado Salad
What you need:
large mixing bowl
bag of lettuce 
4-6 ounces of grilled chicken breast 
3-4 pieces of cooked turkey bacon
2 hard boiled eggs
an avocado
a tomato
dressing of your choice

Pictured here with ridiculous amounts of avocado. Yum!

This recipe is so simple I almost feel ridiculous calling it a 'recipe'. Empty the bag of lettuce in to the mixing bowl. I prefer romaine lettuce but any variety will do. Cut up all the ingredients. I usually cut up the avocado and tomato while keeping an eye on my eggs as they hard boil and chicken as the breasts grill on the stove. Then I pop my turkey bacon slices in the oven to cook for about 10 minutes while I chop up the eggs and chicken. Add all chopped ingredients into the bowl and top with turkey bacon bits (I tear the slices into smaller pieces with my hands) and your dressing (I usually chose blue cheese or balsamic vinegarette). Toss it all together and you're done!

Friday was a weigh-in day and it went a lot better than expected considering my birthday weekend was nothing but gluttony (I got a Sprinkles cupcake tower cake, ya'll!). I am officially -14 from my start. Not as much as I'd hoped by this time but we can't complain about a negative now can we? 

Hope you had a wonderful weekend! Send out some positive internet vibes for me :)

One, Five, Ten.

Monday, March 10, 2014

I saw this link-up on Life of Bon and loved the idea of it. Can you recall answering questions like "where do you think you'll be in [x] years?" when you were in high school? Ever care to look back on those expectations to see if you were right?

As confusing as it may be, by the end of high school, I was simultaneously firm and flexible in my goals for the future. That co-existence seems impossible I know. Let me explain briefly. I struggled quite a bit in high school with a plethora of things, just like every other teenage girl. Mostly, I struggled to accept myself for the person I was. I found it difficult on many different levels to blend who I was with who people expected me to be. By the time I'd turned 18, I'd finally learned to accept myself as I was and love myself wholeheartedly regardless of what others said. (That resolve would continue to be tested over the next few years). So I knew firmly that I wanted to be myself no matter what it 'cost' me, because I worked too long and hard for it, but I wasn't solid on what exactly that meant, as I was completely aware of how malleable I was at just 18 years old. I knew I'd always be me, I just wasn't sure who that was yet.


ONE (2006)
What I thought: Columbia University was my dream school so I thought I'd be finishing up my first year there. I'd finally get to enjoy NYC without the hovering of nervous parents (I was an adult now after all). I'd be majoring in creative writing/english/journalism/some literary-based subject, and my roommate and I would be fast friends. We'd have our own little group of friends and hang out at all the popular LES bars that would serve us. After rejecting all high school boys because they were too immature, I'd have that *perfect boyfriend.

Where I was: Columbia didn't love me nearly as much as I loved it, and after bawling my eyes out over being wait listed, I decided to go to The Pennsylvania State University (not to be confused with UPenn) without so much as a visit. After getting over the initial shock of not going to an Ivy League school as I had always planned to do, I arrived at Penn State's main campus and absolutely fell in love. Attending school out-of-state quickly became the best decision, and still is one of the best decisions, I'd ever made. I roomed with 7 other girls (!) in a huge dorm room with doors that opened to both the boys and girls floors. The room was constantly full of people and liquor and some of the funnest times ensued. Our guy friends busted through our upstairs doors daily scaring the shit out of us. We drunkenly yelled at each other to "sober up" as we passed cops on frat row. I got chased down the hallway with a bottle of NAIR multiple times by a guy friend who had no idea what it did but wanted to test it on my head. I switched my major about six times that year landing on advertising (?) momentarily, but that was ok, because that year might have easily been the best year of my life.

Muddy Mifflin 2006
This is how flag football in the rain ends up. I love each & every person in this photo for all the memories. Muddy footprints on my heart <3







There was no boyfriend in sight after that first year. I'd briefly flirted and kinda hung out with a guy that looked like Cory Matthews (score!). He told all my friends how much he liked me and most nights after a few beers, he'd dance with me and tell me how beautiful he thought I was, but never made a real move on me. So one night at a frat, I drunkenly asked him if he was gay, and although he was a gentleman and walked me home, I haven't spoken to him since. Eeeeep! I hooked up with a football player a few times, but soon lost interest once I realized he had the I.Q. of a potato (& a good kiss here or there wasn't going to make up for that!). I just couldn't find THE boyfriend that year. My physical qualifications for men were quite low, meaning he just has to be tall and hot, that's all I ask. Tons of guys fit this bill (Idris Elba, Zac Efron, Shia LaBeouf,  Dwayne Johnson, Paul Walker etc.).  Although a hot guy is a hot guy, I was looking for something quite rare.

I was crushing hard on Drake back when he was just Aubrey Graham & anything by Linkin Park or My Chemical Romance was basically my anthem.
I can appreciate a hot guy whether he's tall, short, buff, thin, black, white or whatever. But my type was a buff black guy, preferably over 6ft tall, who loved rock and alternative music just as much as I did or at least didn't tease me for it. Trust me - not easy to find.

FIVE (2011)
What I thought: At 18, I was convinced that the only thing I could possibly do well was write, so I just knew I'd be about to publish my first book by 23 if not sooner. If being a writer wasn't enough to pay the bills just yet, I'd be a columnist for a magazine or a newspaper or maybe even teach English or Literature somewhere. I'd see my college friends all the time, especially my core group of friends. I'd have my own apartment in the city, and I'd be dating some brooding artistic type or some business man.
*note: Marriage was never really in the cards for me or a goal of mine. I was cool just being with someone who had his -ish together.  

Where I was: Talk about deviating from the set path! At 23, I found myself in the midst of my first grueling year of law school. Somewhere in my junior year of undergrad, I realized how much I enjoyed arguing discussing things passionately, and how I much I enjoyed corporate law which allowed me to incorporate writing into my career. I never really put away the part of me that wanted to be a real writer, but I put it aside because I didn't believe in myself enough to make it by career. I kept up with quite a few of my college friends, but there were many I dramatically lost contact with (apparently, the drama doesn't get left in high school). I was making a new friends in law school and really enjoyed the free time that I found between classes and studying, even though I felt like such a baby because everyone there was older than me with real lives and families. I was in a long distance relationship with my boyfriend, a relationship that was in it's 3rd year of life and the stress of the distance was taking quite a toll on both of us individually and our relationship as a whole. Frankly, I remember being terrified that our relationship wasn't going to make it out of that year.  

Barrister's Ball. The dress was riding up, I swear!
Girl's Night Out.
Me & my boy at his first apartment.
Right: Valentine's Day 2011; Left: Me. With balloons in my shirt & shorts. Because I'm ridiculous.

TEN (2016)
What I thought: I'm not sure that I thought about my life that far in advance. For me, 25 was always the landmark for success as the year in which I'd have it all figured out. But considering that 25 isn't so far from 28 and I've only just turned 26, I'll go with it. My 18-year-old self probably expected to be very much established by the time I was 28. No doubt, I'd be an author by now, maybe even have a movie deal or two. My friends and I would keep in touch and catch up over lively dinners at our old stomping grounds. As said above, I never really had the goal of marriage like most normal girls do, but I knew that I wanted a pretty serious relationship by now. The one thing I knew back then was that I wanted to have a child in my late-twenties and have at least 2 by the time I turned 30.

Where I am/will be: I look at that last sentence and can't fathom in what world I thought I'd be a mom before 30. Some days I've been bit by the "mommy bug" and can think of nothing but chubby cheeks and slobbery kisses, but I know I'm not ready to be responsible for a little life as of yet and probably won't be ready for quite a few years. And that's perfectly fine by me, so long as I do eventually become one. Oh, and I only really want one these days. We can check the serious boyfriend off the list. That rough patch I mentioned up above? We made it through. And I'm so thankful everyday that we did. As cliché as it sounds, one of happiest parts of my day is when he smiles for no reason at all. It's so strange how after 5 years one can fall in love differently from day to day. Oh, and he may not be obsessed with alternative rock, but he thinks it's cute when I dance around singing my heart out :) I'm close with a few friends from college, although not many, but on the bright side, I've made friends with people in law school who I'm convinced I'll carry with me for the rest of my life. Silver linings, people! Oh, and that book that's suppose to become a movie? There's good and bad news there. Bad news: It hasn't happened; in fact, there isn't even a book from which to derive a thing. Good news: I'm not giving up on it.

The Crazy Kids.


Wedding Photo Booth!


I'm looking forward to plenty of life, love and adventure in the next few years. I'm ready to go beyond the wildest expectations of my 18-year-old self!

Twenty - EFFIN' - Six

Thursday, March 6, 2014

In honor of the day I turn 26 (and because I've gained quite a few followers since I last did an "about me" kind of post), I present 26 random facts about lil ol' me. And by random, I mean completely and uttering freakin' random, which coincidentally might sum me up in one word.


1) Anything the consistency of baby food is disgusting to me, including mashed potatoes and applesauce.

2) I have so much more fun making the list than actually doing things on the list. Planning for greatness? Fun. Doing the things that make you great? Not so fun. 

3) I've memorized all my debit card numbers.

4) Anytime I watch a voice competition show, I mute the t.v. during the commercials and try to sing the songs I just heard. Just to see if I've got what it takes. I don't.

5) I would've been left-handed if my mom didn't force me to use my right was I was younger. That's why it was always so strange that I'm lefty in gymnastics (lead with my left foot) because most people's dominant hand is also their dominant foot.

6) Sleeping is my favorite. I've slept for 24 hours straight before.

7) I hate walking around barefoot, but I also hate getting my slippers wet, so I step into rubber slides when I get out of the shower.

8) Everything is better when drinking it out of a wine glass.

9) I'm an excellent rollerblader but can't skate at all.

10) Every time I buy milk it goes bad in my fridge. Every. Single. Time.

11) I kill every flower I come into contact with, but peonies are one of my favorite things.

12) It totally freaks me out when someone hands me a sharp object with the edge pointing towards me. Have you no concern for my safety?!

13) For about a month in 2000, I wore a backwards red baseball cap everyday because I swore I was a Limp Bizkit backup dancer (re: Rollin').

14) If there's music playing, I'm dancing. It doesn't matter where I am.

15) On Fridays, Saturdays and Sundays, I check the Disney channel 2:30-4am time slot in hopes that they'll play 'Brink!'. It was on last weekend. I recorded it :)

16) I have two middle names.

17) My dream apartment doesn't have multiple bedrooms, the best view or the newest appliances. I just want an extra closet to convert into a sit-in library.

18) I really dislike asking for help.

19) I can still wear a lot of the clothes I've had since I was 14 years old.

20) I prefer cereal without milk. 

21) There's no doubt that I have an addictive personality.

22) If you know me, I swear like a sailor. I usually filter it around people I'm not as comfortable with because I think it's so unladylike.  

23) I could play Crash Bandicoot on Playstation for days straight.

24) I have a pork allergy (including anything cooked in pork grease) and it tastes kinda like soap to me.  

25) Seeing people really happy makes me cry.

26) Falling off of a treadmill or stairmaster is a huge fear of mine. It's just so embarrassing. 


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A Girl Who Reads: Divergent Series

Wednesday, March 5, 2014


Title(s): Divergent; Insurgent; Allegiant
Author: Veronica Roth
Publication(s): 2011,; 2012; 2013


Whenever I write up a book review, I try to be objective about it. So, I feel like I need a disclaimer this time: there may be some subjectivity to my love for this series. Veronica Roth has written a series of novels set to become a multi-million dollar set of movies at the ripe old age of 25 (she wrote the first book, Divergent, during the winter break of her senior year in college!). She is everything I've ever wanted to be, and although part of me is incredibly jealous, another, larger part is optimistic - she did it, it's doable. Claiming that I wanted to be a best-selling novelist with a film adaptation was always confronted with an doubtful response. "Not in your lifetime" I heard coupled with example after example of authors whose novels failed to see the silver screen before they died (think Austen, Larsson and the Brontë sisters). Roth debunks what I began to take as a given and she did it all before her mid-twenties. And because of that I love it (and her!)

That aside, let me explain why I loved the Divergent series. 

My Rating: 5 
I want to say that I decided to review all three books at once because I'm vastly efficient and had the forethought. But honestly, I couldn't find the time between the first book and the second to right down anything aside from a few errant words of praise. "F-amazing. love. must get book 2". Turns out that even if it changes the format of my review, it's better to review the series as a whole to avoid saying too much or giving too much away. The series tracks Beatrice Prior, the 16 year girl who belongs to one of the five factions that post-war U.S. has devolved into, from the day she decides the course of her life - a decision that sets a chain of heart-racing (and at times scary) events in motion that can neither be stopped nor stalled until it arrives at the ultimate destination of the truth.

Divergent is fast-paced, intriguing, surprising and romantic. I loved it, especially on that last count. Although I loved Hunger Games, the one thing I thought it was missing was a little more of that crazy little thing called love. It was there but it wasn't plentiful. And I'm one of those readers who likes a good dose of at least lust if not love. I feel like Divergent gave me just enough of both romance and world/character building. I finished the novel feeling like I knew this world, this girl, and this love. In a way, I felt like a faction member because of how well Roth described this world and because how lovable her characters were. The factions were clearly laid out: Erudite, the beacon of knowledge; Dauntless, the fearless daredevils; Amity, the generous caregivers; Candor, the advocate of black-and-white honesty; Abnegation, the selfless saints. And Roth's characters are robust, round, complex people with honorable traits and faults, who are all the better for the rough bits. No one was perfect because no one really is. I could relate to every single one, even those that seem like examples of pure evil or absolute perfection. My only complaint for this first novel is that I would've liked to see more "settling in" (those who've read the first novel should know what I'm talking about). I know there are lots of people that like the quick movement of a novel from one crazy revelation to the next, but I enjoy writing especially when things are chill, mundane even, the "calm before the storm" if you will. I find beauty in those moments, but I'm thinking that's just the writer in me. 
A few things here or there where a little predictable but nothing that ruins the story (just moments when characters finally put it all together you're like "well duh!"). But other things were so unexpected and exhilarating that you couldn't stop yourself from turning the page or, you know, running out to buy the next book at Barnes & Noble even though you know if you waited for 2 days, you'd get it from Amazon.com at half price. 

And run out for the second book Insurgent, I did. Insurgent carries on in the footsteps of its predecessor. Now that quite a few things have happened, Insurgent aims to make sense of it, delving into the 'how' of it all now that we've witnessed the 'what'. Undoubtedly, there's less romance than the first book and plenty of the "real life drama" secrets and the past bring, which is why I'm surprised that Insurgent is actually my favorite of the three. The pacing didn't slow down but rather picked up right where Divergent left off. This book is what I'd call "the nitty gritty" of the story. The reader soon discovers that very little is as it seems, those we think are good perhaps aren't so good. Characters' reputations change dramatically as some become more loved, others become more hated, and some switch sides entirely. I remember reading on Roth's blog (yes, I read her blog religiously now) that every character has to have a purpose and if not, they get cut. It's clear she abides by her own advice. Roth jumps head first into the personalities of many, making the peeks we got in Divergent pale in comparison. Through her characters, she questions the virtues of the first installment, finding that every virtue has a complementary vice and none are mutually exclusive. Nothing is black-and-white, but rather fifty shades of gray (no pun intended!). Insurgent is like peeling back the layers of an onion, searching for the core not knowing if this is the last protective layer and never quite sure if the next pull will take it too far.    

If Insurgent gives us the 'how' and bits and pieces of the 'why', Allegiant attempts to answer the 'who' and flesh out the 'why' even further. I say attempts because if I'm honest, it does get a bit muddled in explanation. There are moments when I thought "wait, how'd we get here?" as if we'd skipped entire points that would've made the story easier to understand. If you suspend the questions for a moment, you realize that those 'gaps' don't actually effect the story, but I understand why many get hung up on them. Although I liked seeing things from inside someone else's head, the switching of the point of view in this book didn't help to alleviate confusion. A few times, I had to look back to see who was telling the story because the voice of second narrator felt undeveloped. Yet, as a writer who has tried to do the dual point of view in my own work, it's not as easy as it seems. All in all, Allegiant felt rushed, and that in combination with a heavy editing hand attributes to the confusion, in my opinion. Now the ending that everyone's complaining about? Although I cried my way through the final 50 pages of the novel, I understood it. I know sure as shit that I could never do the same (and in some ways, it felt like the story was being pushed in that direction because it was something Roth thought of since book 1), but I respect the hell out of it. 

If you've read the Divergent series, entirely or the first book, I'd love to read your thoughts! Am I the only crazy who will be rereading Divergent before the March 21st movie premiere?

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