Friday, September 20, 2013

React to this term: comfort.

I'm not sure if I've felt comfort in my life, yet, at times I think I may feel it everyday. I know that sounds very confusing, and well, that's because I'm confused by it myself. It may have something to do with the whole "big picture, small picture" thing.

Day by day, moment by moment, I find comfort in the "little things" so to speak. I try to rise early, but usually end up pulling myself from my sheets at around noon. I stroll to the gym in the sunshine, listening to Pandora's Kings Of Leon station. I lolligag about my apartment, tidying this and blogging or commenting on that. I feel pretty relaxed and at ease most days. Dare I say - comfortable.

When I reflect on my entire life or think of the age-old question "what am I doing with my life?", the last thing I feel is comfort. I'm actually quite uncomfortable with the position I'm in. This isn't to say I'm not okay with having 2+ months off after taking the Bar to build my blog (which I really adore doing), redecorate my apartment, focus on fitness, and run around the city, because I really do relish in those moments. I'm just a bit restless is all. I've neglected quite a bit. Certain decisions in my life, although not terrible ones, could have been made better, and I'm beginning to realize that one's life becomes defined by the series of small decisions you make along the way. I guess I always knew that. It's just recently made me uncomfortable.

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